Pre-season

Welcome, welcome, welcome! It’s Week 0 of ‘A View from Row Z’ and I am back once again (like the renegade master) for another 17 weeks of me probably not fully understanding what I am talking about, but knowing enough to make sure everyone is accountable for the poor decisions, missed opportunities, near misses and hopefully, a few wins along the way. After Matt Hulme’s win last season, the league is now renamed, as per tradition, to CeeDee Compilation Bowl and with the new name also comes a couple of new faces. So, here it is, a quick draft review and introductions to each player so we all know who we are playing and why it’s so enjoyable to watch someone lose 12 games in a row. Now, enough rambling from me, let’s get this show on the road with the words of the great Samuel L. Jackson…

“Hold onto your butts”.

And so it begins, the off-season is a slow time, but I have to say, I have been looking forward to getting going and as always, the draft proved difficult to organise. Trying to accommodate trips to Mexico City, bedtimes for those with kids, people having to actually work and making sure Andy had enough recovery time from his in-person draft on Sunday. After a little 11th hour drama with Dali’s autopicks, yes yes, it won’t make a difference I hear your cry, but we have to give the 12-game losing streak record holder every chance he can get this year. Nobody wants to see that record broken again…do they?

As a quick note, I am actively embracing the usage of AI tools this year (aren’t we all - right Andy 😏) and so some insights have been powered by my friend ChatGPT. This week, I have asked our AI Overlord to rate our draft and give us a grade. Surprising results to be honest - Reece, we were all laughing, but apparently according to the raw data - your draft (3 QBs and Shedeur aside) was the best. Go figure. This one is all about introductions, so I will start in finishing order from last season.

Matt Hulme © - EverybodyNeedsGoodNabers // Saints Fan // Draft Grade - E (powered by ChatGPT)

Last year's Champion. Started as a rookie and took home the title. The sort of underdog story Reece could only dream of. Completed his draft whilst sat in the green room ‘working’ for ‘A League of Their Own’ and with a surprise TE pick (albeit a top drawer TE) in round two, I wasn’t sure how seriously Matt was taking this. Starting where he left off last year, an updated team name and having had the whole off-season to think about it, he’s set the bar pretty high.

Matt O’Daly - Third Time Charmers // Rams Fan // Draft Grade - E (powered by ChatGPT)

The past two seasons’ bridesmaid is hoping that this season it will be third time lucky, and much like Arsenal, will be able to turn that 2nd place into championship material this time around. My 10th pick was always going to be tough, ChatGPT was consulted and a plan was formed. However, as with any plan, it didn’t survive first contact. The 1 minute picks got me all flustered and my own ineptitude surfaced rather rapidly. Nacua picked first, but the pull of CMC’s hamstrings was too strong and my boom or bust choice was made. Weak at QB, my favoured picks taken, I took Goff in the 8th round, #regret, and to double down on bad choices, I went for 2025 relics Dak Prescott and Jakobi Meyers. Every cloud though, I did pick up the aptly named Cameron Dicker (the Kicker) in Round 12…so there’s that I guess.

Richard Berkshire (Rich) - A Tadd McShonkey // Chargers Fan // Draft Grade - E (powered by ChatGPT)

My fellow Commissioner came out strongly with a well thought-out team name and probably the nicest-looking logo in the league. But is it all style over substance? Rich’s great run in the regular season could not translate into a win last time around, so he had to make his #1 pick work. The smart money said Chase or Barkley, but in a move to keep everyone guessing, he opted for Bijan Robinson. Obviously not a poor choice, but not the one we were expecting. Rich clearly had a plan and after 6 RBs, no Kicker - it’s either genius or complete chaos. An excellent QB pickup in Round 3 for Jayden Daniels and a tail end of excellent WRs and RBs, showed just how much strength and depth he was going for. Some quick pickups in the waivers to make up for his lack of Kicker was expected.

Stephen Best (Besty) - Multiple Goregasms // Steelers Fan // Draft Grade - E (powered by ChatGPT)

One of two Geordies in this league, Besty is a long-time veteran of this league and a tough competitor throughout. A big Steelers fan and, unsurprisingly, a Newcastle fan too - is it too early to mention Isak? He has had a very solid draft. I always think it’s ‘slightly’ better to be somewhere in the middle of a snake draft, as there is consistency to your picks and his first 5 rounds - precision personified. Bo Nix is an excellent pickup and keeps this dependable, maybe slightly predictable team, alive.

Andrew Saiker (Andy) - Game of Throws // Giants Fan // Draft Grade - E (powered by ChatGPT)

Another OG of this league. Past champion, probably over-qualified and long suffering Giants and Man Utd fan. Had an absolute touch with Ja’marr Chase and Joe Burrow stack, it was a strong opening for Andy in the draft. A safe draft if I ever saw one, but it’s solid and going to be tough to beat. The Overlord says, ‘Draft screams ‘safe but boring’. If mediocrity was a trophy, it’d already be in your cabinet.’ Seems harsh but I am not going to correct it.

Jen Cullen - Snowshufflerjr // Seahawks Fan // Draft Grade - E (powered by ChatGPT)

2021 and 2022’s Champion. The only multiple winner of this league. A force to be reckoned with, but it really looks like a WR museum with this draft. Much like Rich and his RB haul, Jen went the other way with 6 WR picks. A strong QB choice, but I fear you may be spending some time unearthing gems on the Waiver Wire in the weeks to come. To be fair though, if anyone has the knowledge, it’s Jen. Don’t write her off just yet.

Darren Ali (Dali) - Dali’s Salvadors // Cardinals Fan // Draft Grade - E (powered by ChatGPT)

Former Commissioner, second Geordie, Vegan, holder of the longest losing streak in this league's history, maverick draft picker, former actor, master meditator, ticketing hero, other league talker and all round good bloody bloke. Dali. Small drama pre-draft about autopicks, but it seems like he’s done alright this time around. 2 TE’s seems a little bit much, he drafted like a man with a crystal ball…with a few cracks in it. Nick Chubb? You did well to get rid quickly - that knee won’t hold up.

Reece Parkinson - Shedeurs Support Group // Jaguars Fan // Draft Grade - B (powered by ChatGPT)

Last year’s Shit King. Over-reliance on the Commissioner assist. But tells us he is fully focused this year. Opted for the Autopick draft, while completing a walking tour of Mexico City. The day after running a marathon? Are you ok? QB as a 1st Round pick, 2 Jaguars WRs, a Kicker in RD5, DST in RD6, a long tail of RBs and Kyle ‘It’s going to be his year’ Pitts. Wild stuff. To my untrained eye, it looked bad. The AI reviewed you like this, ‘Drafted like a bargain-hunter on Black Friday. Still, did you really need 3 QBs?’. Still, you dropped Shedeur like a stone straight after, let’s see if you really did know what you were doing.

The Rookies

Zan Crabbe - Team zancrabbe // Seahawks Fan // Draft Grade - E (powered by ChatGPT)

Apparently we have welcomed a stone cold assassin into our ranks. Commissioner of two other leagues - we look forward to hearing all about those 😉 - previous winner elsewhere, he joins our league with some pedigree. A good draft, bit jealous he has Josh Allen, although I am still not over his fortuitous collapse at the end of last season. I am sure you’re looking forward to that front row seat to Kelce’s retirement tour, at least he gets the girl in the end. Let’s see how this pans out - would be nice to see a team name change, not feeling the creativity.

Mike Elliot - Breece Lightning // Jets Fan // Draft Grade - D (powered by ChatGPT)

Once a Rams fan, but the games were past his bedtime. Now a Jets fan. I am certain there were better choices out there, but here we are. First time playing an NFL Fantasy Football league, so he is as green as that Jets logo. Good first draft, you can’t go wrong with Saquon Barkley and banking on Mahomes to return to his best. ChatGPT summarized this draft as, ‘Apparently trying to form an entire WR orchestra. Hope your lone QB never pulls a hamstring’. Opening game against Jen, let’s hope you hit the ground running.

Overview from the Overlord

Each team has been graded across two systems:

• Draft Value Grade: efficiency versus ADP (steals vs reaches)

• Season Outlook Grade: roster balance, depth, upside, risk

Best Overall Draft – Shedeurs Support Group

Ranked 1st in both Draft Value and Season Outlook. Multiple steals and strong balance, though QB-heavy. The most efficient draft overall.

Biggest Risk/Reward – Breece Lightning

Some huge value plays (Cole Kmet late) but also major reaches. Wide receiver heavy build could pay off or flop. Thin at QB depth.

Needs Most Work – Multiple Goregasms

Finished last in both categories. Overpaid on several players, roster lacks upside. Will need waivers/trades to compete.

Middle of the Pack - Snowshufflerjr, A Tadd McShonkey, Dali’s Salvadors

Average-to-below across metrics. Each landed some steals but offset with reaches. Need breakout WRs/RBs to contend.

Struggled in Draft Room - EverybodyNeedsGoodNabers, Game of Throws, Third Time Charmers, Team zancrabbe Bottom third across both systems. Some good late picks but too many early overpays. Will rely on in-season management.

I did ask it to grade us from A-D and somehow most of us received an E. Let’s prove the machines wrong. We’ve got this. Don’t let humanity down. See you in Week 1!

Match Ups

Third Time Chamers vs A Tadd McShonkey

Dali’s Salvadors vs Shadeurs Support Group

Multiple Goregasms vs Team zancrabbe

Game of Throws vs EverybodyNeedsGoodNabers

SnowshufflerJr vs Breece Lightning